Tame the tongue.

For we all stumble in many things. If anyone does not stumble in word, he is a perfect man, able also to bridle the whole body. - James 3:2

Argh. I hate the feeling of regret and conviction I get when I realise I've done something wrong. I absolutely hate it. My conscience is strong, so I feel really bad when I let myself down, or when I let God down with some stupid thing that I did or said earlier. Usually these two disappointments come together. That rotten feeling is amplified when you know that you're supposed to be spiritually and emotionally mature enough not to sin.

I can't tame my tongue. It's as though I don't control it, and it has a mind of its own. I would think about saying nice things to bless and encourage people before, and then when I speak, verbal garbage starts to spew out endlessly. I'm really afraid one day it'll hurt someone. Or maybe it already did, and I'm none the more aware. I tell myself not to say anything. Sometimes I do that. But other times, like just now, I don't. And especially when I'm kind of stressed and want to chill out with my friends, I tend to forget who I am. I'm a child of God, a Christian. I'm not supposed to sin.

I guess I'm still on the long hard road to perfection...

Change

Change is inevitable. I guess things don't remain the same all the time. Well, that can be a good thing when life sucks, but when change forces you out of your comfort zone, it's not so good - at least in the short term.

Anyway, I can't help but feel quite stressed. There're so many changes going on in my life now. Upcoming exams - a change in my lifestyle and disposition. Cell group multiplication and the end of JC - a change in the friends I hang out with. Army enlistment, university applications and the list goes on.

I've gotten used to being so carefree. Some may call it slacking off, but I'd rather think that's the way we should live life. Don't be so hardcore about everything. Do what you like to do, and let passion drive you towards excellence. I bet at least half the people in my school hate studying mindlessly.

I've gotten used to my friends - E222 and 08SO6E - people I have spent lots of time with over the past year. Good times and bad times, light-hearted moments and dull moments... I love them, I really do. And it sucks to know we must all move on.

Ultimately, only God doesn't change. And I'm thankful for that.

(Im)mature

"I don't care what you say! I know I'm mature!" (fictional statement of self-denial)

One wonders where the word immature came from.

Look no further than the author of this post for an apt description of the word.

I'm still so imperfect... That's why I need God.

I looked at myself in the mirror once.

Gosh. I'm lost in a world of academics, when there's so much more out there to see, to hear and to do.

I love nature, music, sports, food, art and almost everything else. I love this world. I want to immerse myself in culture.

I want to see the world and try out new things, so that when I'm old, I won't regret not living out my youth.

I want to make a difference in this world, and make sure that everyone around me leads a better life because of what I have done.

I don't know how time flies
But I do know that when it does
It goes by in a blink of an eye.

Lord, teach me to number my days. And to know what is really important.

My father told me in a stressful time:
Ask God for the peace to accept things you cannot change,
for the courage to change the things you can,
and the wisdom to know the difference.